In Japanese society, the relationship between an employee and the firm is much more interdependent, somewhat similar to a child-mother relationship where the mother (firm) is obliged to take care of her children (employees) and children (employees) have to obey and follow the commands of their mother (firm).
It is not surprising for an American to try to find another job before he or she leaves his or her present employer if he or she considers it necessary for him – or herself. However, this action was regarded by the Japanese firm as disloyal, undermining the trust between the two parties. In spite of this, the manager of the firm did not like the parting to be understood as Brent being fired, because the appearance of harmony and agreement with the group (the firm in this case) is important in Japanese society.
Case 9
When they were being scolded by the trainers for being repeatedly late for afternoon sessions, the Chinese trainees felt bewildered because they thought it inappropriate for the Canadian trainers to become so angry about it. In their opinion, one should let him- or herself as emotionally like this. The appropriate way to deal with such a person would be become cooler toward and more distant from the person who behaved so irresponsibly. It was understandable that one would feel angry in this situation but it was not appropriate to show anger, for the other person would certainly lose face if anger were directed toward him or her, and the angry person would look foolish and childish and therefore would also lose face.
Canadians see such situations in a very different way. They tend to explicitly express how they feel and openly criticize the person who they think has been wrong or irresponsible. It seems to them that this has little to do with face.
Case 16
What went wrong in this case? Contrary to general American perception, it is considered proper behavior for Japanese to be silent. It is a discreet way to show respect if he listens to others speak rather than speaking out. So the Japanese delegates did what they considered proper, i.e., listen quietly to what the Americans had to say. Silence often means that they are seriously thinking about the subject at issue. But many Americans will interpret silence in a conversation to mean disapproval, disagreement, or even arrogance. This is an example that illustrates the problem of the so-called “perception gap”. Participants in communication perceive each other’s behavior in very different ways, which often results in misunderstanding or conflict.
Case 17
It is customary in China and many other Asian countries for hosts to ask guests again and again to take more. Tom didn’t have to eat extra food if he didn’t want any more.
In the US, a host will offer more food usually only once. And the Americans will take a “no” to mean “no”, whether it’s the first, second, or third time. However, in many other parts of the world it is considered good manners for guests not to accept an offer at first. Sometimes one mustn’t accept food the second time it is offered. Therefore, hosts will try to repeat an offer until they are sure that their guests really want to decline.
Case 18